My Damn Decision

I’ve been focusing on gaming so much these past few months that I haven’t been posting about social issues on my blog. It’s time to make up for that.

Given that America (and the world) continues to have a lack of understanding about sexual consent and respect for women’s bodies, I’m reblogging this haiku poem called My Damn Decision that I found about consent to be touched. Why is it that we teach women not to be raped, instead of teaching men not to rape?

Please read this poem, think about it, and share it–help educate men about this issue.


My Damn Decision

(author’s name withheld)

Idina Menzel
Gets groped by John Travolta
During the Oscars

Bill Clinton is known
For touching random women
Whispering to them

Customers touch me
Rubbing my shoulder because
I’m serving their drinks

“You’d be prettier
If you would smile, baby.”
“No.” “You ugly bitch.”

Women must be taught
How not to get raped by men
When they’re in public

“Don’t go out alone”
“Don’t wear revealing clothing.”
“Don’t get drunk with men.”

Who decided that
Men have a right to how I
Use my own body?

You trigger my pain
I had to deal with it once
When I was sixteen

Why do you force me
To relive that evening
Every damn day

Rape culture must stop
And it has to stop today
Stop making this worse

I’m not the only
Girl whose choices were stolen
And won’t be the last

But if every
Man stood up for those women
Things would get better

Daughters and sisters
Wives and mothers need your help
Tell men, “Stop raping.”

Gender Icons


6 thoughts on “My Damn Decision

  1. I say do both. We teach our children martial arts while at the same time teaching people that mugging is wrong.

    We live in the real world and in the real world people do terrible things no matter what we educate.

    When you agreed to an offline meet up of course you didn’t deserve to be raped, but at the same time would the rape have been prevented if you had someone there to back you up? People call that victim blaming, but you know that they’d call a man an idiot for walking around in a nice suit at East LA and gets mugged.

    It’s a dangerous world out there and you have 3 options to keep yourself safe. Protect yourself, educate others or both. Of those three both is the best answer.

    • Agreed. There will always be sickos in the world, who think they can take what they want, consent be damned. No amount of education can fix certain people. However, a few well-placed strikes can give you a fighting chance.

  2. This poem is so honest. And I think it’s disturbing that my much has changed with the rape culture. Society still continues to blame victims and tell girls what to do to avoid rape, while it’s socially acceptable for drunk men to grope women in bars and blame it on the alcohol.

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